"Q": HOW EXACTLY CAN I START TAKING STEPS TOWARDS SELF LOVE. I STRUGGLE WITH BEING ALONE. I FEEL LIKE I HAVE NO PURPOSE BESIDES SCHOOL & WORK.....
"A": *gives hug!* OK, let me start out by saying, YOU ARE NOT ALONE. No matter how alone you feel, EVERYONE struggles with truly loving themselves at some time in their life. Sooo FIRST things FIRST, stop being so hard on yourself!! I would say embrace your school experience and work experience because in all honesty, the two of those things, can actually be considered as a hobby!!! So you already have 2 things to be proud of!
As far as being alone, KEEP IN MIND THAT you’ve already made the first step, and that’s admitting what you struggle with!! Like you’ve surpassed millions of people who live in denial because it’s easier, sooo consider yourself ahead of the curve! Yes, being alone is HARD and can be saddening, but it's something that comes with practice and one of the MOST IMPORTANT steps needed to get to Self Love!
Me personally, I enjoy being alone because it is something that I practiced for a period of time and have developed an appreciation for it. And yea from time to time I may shed a tear wondering when I won’t be lonely, but I also know that I have grown to love myself soooo much that I refuse to sacrifice my peace for anyone that doesn’t deserve it and because of that, my ass is just gonna have to be lonely! lol
But that’s just me and who I have GROWN into overtime! Now for you, I would encourage you to set goals for yourself so when you're alone you can actively work towards them. Meaning make time to take time to organize your day with a to do list and actually do it! Make it a point to try new things because that’s the only way you will find your way. For instance, people watch, count cars, journal your feelings! Hell, doodle outfits!! or play dress up and literally practice poses in the mirror!!!! YOU have to DEFINE YOUR HOBBY!!! because there are plenty of things that you can do, it's just about you taking the time to genuinely invest in yourself so you can do it! ALSO, try using what you already have in your life to help occupy your time For example, school and work, I'm sure there is something you like about both that you can figure out how it can bring a little joy to your life and remind you how purposeful your life is!
Meaning, nothing is too small of a hobby or an interest!! For example, when I worked at JR Crickets as a waitress, I had no idea how to cook sooooo I would just stay in the kitchen and talk to the chef and watch what he did on my breaks! Or when I worked for the Hawks, I would people watch and try and figure out what their lives were like! Those are small things, but those are things that I appreciate because they allowed me to stretch my mind and use my creativity... Sooo you’ve just gotta start literally using what you have to get what you want!
Just because you haven't found a hobby, does not mean you have no purpose!! ARE YOU KIDDING ME!! That hobby is 10% of your life and YOU are 90%!! Meaning YOU MAKE THE HOBBY IT DOESN'T MAKE YOU!!!
So RESET your mind and find the blessing in your life at hand! It's not about you how lonely you are, it’s about what you do in your time of loneness. Don't be down on yourself! It takes time, time of which you’ve wasted ENOUGH of second guessing and questioning your purpose, it’s time to put in the work so you can find it! Focus less on not having a hobby and just be good at investing time in yourself because doing that is a hobby in itself! Not to mention that if you don’t do it, no one else will…
Give yourself time, practice patience, find life in your loneliness and purpose in the temporary pain! YOU GOT THIS!!!
